The New Parenting Club

Daylight-Saving Time: Preparing Baby
From the new Parenting.com dr Jeffrey Fine
THANKS TO ANGELIQUE MILLETTE FOR THIS SHORT AND IMPORTANT ARTICLE.
On Sunday, March 14, clocks will be set forward one hour. With the time change quickly approaching, you may be wondering how to transition baby or toddler without upsetting their sleep routine.
Help your child spring forward beginning Tuesday, March 9, by putting them to sleep 10 minutes earlier each night. Make it easier by comforting, singing or reading, and/or starting your bedtime routine sooner. By Sunday, your child will have slowly adjusted to the new time.
If your baby or toddler’s bedtime is 7 p.m., it will look like this:
Tuesday: 6:50 p.m. bedtime
Wednesday: 6:40 p.m. bedtime
Thursday: 6:30 p.m. bedtime
Friday: 6:20 p.m. bedtime
Saturday 6:10 p.m. bedtime
Sunday: 7 p.m. bedtime (accounting for the time change)
It takes about a week for babies and toddlers to adjust to a new time schedule. Your little one may be a bit cranky, or seem more tired than usual. Stick to your routine and keep naps at the same time. Once you’ve both adjusted, enjoy the increased daylight (which means more playtimes!).

OUR NEW SERIES: “OUR FATHERS”
We live in an era of absent fathers. The father is either physically or psychologically absent from our homes and family life, and the philosophers are saying he is gone from our mythic and religious lives as well.
The love unit most damaged by the Industrial Revolution has been the father-son bond. It presented us a new situation, never existing before. In earlier times a boy and his father lived closely together with each other, especially in the work-world after the age of 12. The Industrial Revolution not only took the men out of family life but it was the start of public schooling as we know it, thus taking the children out of family life as well.
This can be considered the beginning of the gradual destruction of the family as a unit. This dilemma continues today with fathers in offices and sons not able to grasp exactly what it is that the father is doing. Even brought to the office what can he show him? How he moves papers? How he works on his computer? How can he explain that what he is doing is important or how it differs from what other men are doing? The German psychologist Alexander Mitcherich writes about this in his very fine book “Society Without the Father.” His main point is that if the son does not understand, clearly physically what his father is doing all year, all day; a hole will appear in the son’s perception of his father. Children take things in physically not mentally; how can the son comprehend his father?
As a result many boys today are being ‘single-parented by the mother even though the father is still with the family.
The great psychiatrist Carl Jung made a very insightful observation: he said that if a male is brought up mainly with the mother, he will take a feminine attitude toward his father. He will see his father through his mother’s eyes. Since the father and the mother are in competition, consciously or unconsciously for the affection of the son, you’re not going to get a straight picture of your father out of your mother. Instead, all the inadequacies of the father are well pointed out. The mother tends to give the ‘sense’ that civilization, culture, feeling and relationship are things that the mother and the son and the daughter have together. Whereas, what the father has may be brutal, unfeeling, obsessed, too rational, uncompassionate or too focused on money-making.
So the young male often grows up with a wounded image of his father – not necessarily caused by his father’s actions, but based on the mother’s interpretation of these actions.
If the son accepts his mother’s view of his father, he will look at his own masculinity from a feminine point of view. But eventually the male must throw off this view and begin to discover for himself what the father is, and what masculinity is.
Of course, it would be much better for the son to have a close relationship with his father from the beginning of his life. One of the main reasons that we favor and applaud the ‘family-bed’ or what today is called ‘co-sleeping’ is that this beautifully compensates for much of the absence of the father and mother in today’s busy and separated life-style. It allows ‘night-time-parenting’ to occur, that is, a time to cuddle, joke and talk with each other when the day’s activities prevent the connection. In this way a father sees his son every morning, getting up with him, and listening to his dreams. To have his son come into the bathroom to watch his father shave and ready himself for the day. Eventually naturally imitating this by himself and learning how to get ready.
More in this series: – “OUR FATHERS” will be presented in the next several Blogs.

Champagne Keeps Heart Disease at Bay
Wednesday, December 30, 2009 7:55 AM
From Newsmax

When you toast the New Year with a glass of bubbly, you’ll be starting 2010 right, say top British scientists: they have discovered that drinking champagne every day—just like red wine—helps keep strokes and heart attacks away.
Research has shown that two daily glasses of red wine help stave off circulation and heart problems. The health-boosting ingredients are thought to be polyphenol antioxidants, which occur naturally in fairly high levels in red wine but not in white. Polyphenols slow the removal of nitric oxide from the blood, which reduces blood pressure, thereby lowering the risks of strokes and heart attacks.
But what about red wine’s rich cousin champagne, which is made with three varieties of grapes, two black and one white? “The question was: would champagne have the same impact as red wine or would it have the limited impact of white wine?” Dr. Jeremy Spencer of Reading University asked the Daily Mail.
Lovers of champagne can let out a sigh of relief. “We have found that a couple of glasses a day has a beneficial effect on the walls of blood vessels—which suggests champagne has the potential to reduce strokes and heart disease,” Spencer said. “It is very exciting news.”
The research team determined that champagne had a much bigger effect on blood levels of nitric oxide than a plain mixture of alcohol and carbonated water which contained no polyphenols. In the paper detailing the study, the team said, “Our data suggests that a daily moderate consumption of champagne wine may improve vascular performance via the delivery of phenolic constituents.”
But what about people who want to improve their health but cannot afford champagne every day? The researchers said there was “no reason” other types of sparkling wines should not perform just as well.
And what about teetotalers? The research team also found high levels of polyphenols in cocoa beans, suggesting that a mug of hot cocoa will achieve the same healthful results. However, Spencer said, “The benefit is certainly the same but it doesn’t seem as much fun somehow.”

HEALTH ALERT: Men Smokers Risk Rheumatoid Arthritis

Smoking is a risk factor for rheumatoid arthritis (RA), a new analysis of 16 studies confirms.
The effect is especially strong in men and heavy smokers, the researchers found. And men who tested positive for rheumatoid factor (RF), a self-attacking antibody found in about 80 percent of RA patients, were at even higher risk if they smoked.
Research over the past two decades has linked smoking to RA, especially in men, Dr. S. Kumagai of Kobe University Graduate School of Medicine in Kobe, Japan and his colleagues write. But findings on smoking and RA in women have been “inconsistent.”
The researchers conducted the first systematic analysis of research on RA risk and smoking, looking at 16 studies in all.
Men who were current smokers were at nearly double the risk of RA, Kumagai and colleagues found, and the effect was roughly the same in ever- and past smokers. When the researchers looked at RF-positive RA, they found male smokers were at nearly four-fold risk of the disease, while risk was tripled in ever-smokers and about 2.5 times greater for past smokers.
Smoking also increased RA risk in women, but to a lesser degree. Female current, ever- and ex-smokers had a 1.2 to 1.3 times greater likelihood of developing RA, whether or not they were RF-positive.
The men who had logged at least 20 pack years—meaning they had smoked at least 20 cigarettes a day for 20 years—were 2.3 times more likely to develop RA, while for women risk was increased 1.75-fold.
Smoking has been linked to RF production, the researchers note. The relationship among RF, RA, and smoking may be different for women, they add, due to hormonal factors.
“Any type of smoking constitutes a significant risk factor for the development of RA,” Kumagai and colleagues write. “Because RA is associated with a poor quality of life and life prognosis, we recommend cessation of smoking for current smokers, especially heavy smokers to prevent or reduce the risk of developing RA.

BABY PRODUCT REVIEW
By Dalit Fine, MS.
Name of the Product: Ergo baby carrier
Description of Product: This is a piece of baby equipment I would not do without. There comes a point with the sling, when baby is so heavy he pulls on your neck and shoulders.
It’s time to switch to an ERGO baby carrier.
It is a lightweight carrier made out of denim that buckles around the hips allowing you to carry a baby or older child (up to 5 years old) on your back or in the front. An additional buckle around the chest provides additional safety. A flap behind baby’s back can be velcroed through two loops to support the head if baby falls asleep. ERGO carriers come in a variety of colors and currently sell for around $100.00. They are worth every penny.
The ERGO Baby Carrier’s ergonomic design supports a correct sitting position for the baby’s hip, pelvis and spine growth. It disperses most of the baby’s weight between the hips and thighs, which help to eliminate any pressure points and hip strain which other carriers can cause. The ERGO also balances the baby’s weight to parents’ hips and shoulders, and alleviates physical stress for the parent.
You can also get ant Infant Insert- The design encourages healthy maturation of the spine by supporting the pelvis, hip joint, and leg position rather than putting a baby in a compromising sitting position before the spine is ready. The ERGO baby Infant Insert also supports the safety of the baby’s head and neck in this critical stage of development.
What do you like about the product? ERGO carriers are designed to put the baby’s weight squarely on the mother or father’s hips. This relieves back and shoulder strain and makes the baby feel light. There is no backpack frames, so the carrier is compact and can be easily packed in a bag for travel or just thrown into the car. The material is incredibly sturdy so there is no question about it being able to hold a heavier baby. My ERGO carrier has been a lifesaver for me when running errands with my child as he got older and heavier and still wanted at times to be on mommy. Around the house I can hold my son on my back when he wants to be held while I must be doing something else. It’s washable and dries overnight on a line.
What do you dislike about it (if applicable)? It’s important to make sure baby is all the way inside the carrier or he’s not as stable on my back. Sometimes that is difficult for whatever reason. I jiggle the baby around to make sure he’s in and that does the trick, but this is a concern to be aware of each time baby is put in the carrier.
I use the carrier mostly as a front carrier because I like to make eye contact. The important thing for front carrying is to buckle low around the hips. Baby can even nurse in that position. Also, you can buy an infant insert for carrying a really young baby, but I’ve just stuck with a sling for that.
The only thing I don’t like about my ERGO carrier is that it doesn’t come equipped with an alarm to keep me from forgetting it as I’m packing up to run errands. I’ve forgotten it a few times when I’ve had several places to stop and I sure have missed it. Can product be purchased online? Yes. Where? www.ergocarrier.com .

TIME AND THE SOUL
It is necessary to realize that technology itself is not the cause of our problem of [not having enough] time. Its influence on our lives is a result, not a cause — the result of an unseen accelerating process taking place in ourselves, in our inner being. Whether we point to the effect of communication technology (such as e-mail) with its tyranny of instant communication; or to the computerization, and therefore the mentalization of so many human activities that previously required at least some participation of our physical presence; or to any of the other innumerable transformations of human life that are being brought about by the new technologies, the essential element to recognize is how much of what we call “progress” is accompanied by and measured by the fact that human beings need less and less conscious attention to perform their activities and lead their lives.
The real power of the faculty of attention, unknown to modern science, is one of the indispensable and most central measures of humanness — of the being of a man or a woman — and has been so understood, in many forms and symbols, at the heart of all great spiritual teaching of the world. The effects of advancing technology, for all its material promise they offer the world (along with the dangers, of course) is but the most recent wave in a civilization that, without recognizing what it was doing, has placed the satisfaction of desire above the cultivation of being.
The deep meaning of many rules of conduct and the principles of the past — so many of which have been abandoned without our understanding their real roots in human nature — involved the cultivation and development of the uniquely human power of attention and its action in the body, heart and mind of man. To be present, truly present, is to have conscious attention. This capacity is the key to what it means to be human.
It is not, therefore, the rapidity of change as such that is the source of our problem of time. It is the metaphysical fact that the being of man is diminishing.

–Jacob Needleman, in Time and the Soul

Should Parents Apologize to their Children?
Here’s an item from Chabad by Sara Radcliffe that I think is very important and want to pass along.

Every single one of us makes mistakes sometimes. Every single one of us is imperfect. Every single one of us needs to improve in some way.
You’d think this was obvious, but it is not. There are many parents who present themselves to their kids as if perfect. Such parents never apologize for anything because, in their opinion, they are never wrong. At the same time, they may be very hard on their children – quick to identify mistakes and deficiencies. Often being critical and insistent on hearing apologies for their wrongdoings. When children are young, they have no choice but to absorb the criticism and complaints. But when they become adolescents, they may take to talking back and challenging the parent.
“You’re always screaming at me!” a teen might complain. “That’s because you never listen!” retorts the parent. The parent actually teaches the child, through his or her model, that defensive remarks are appropriate ways to respond to criticism. Unfortunately, such a lesson will handicap the child later on in his or her adult relationships. Defensiveness doesn’t work! It pushes people apart instead of bringing them closer together. Moreover, it indicates a haughty attitude, the kind of attitude that is not liked by G d. The Bible is replete with condemnations of haughtiness and similarly replete with praise for those who are humble. This Biblical statement sums it up powerfully: “Someone haughty in spirit, it is as though he were an idolater”. He worships himself! Humility allows people to apologize. Arrogance holds them back. What works is acknowledgement. Hearing, accepting and validating a complaint really work in marriage, parenting and professional situations. But children need to experience this process first hand. They need to learn it from their parents. Parents are models. Remember: Children learn what they see, not what they are told

So what should a parent say when accused of screaming too much? The parent might respond: “You’re right, I do scream a lot. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be doing that. I need to handle my frustration better.” This attention, acknowledgement and validation are a very nice apology. It will help the child learn to formulate similar responses to attacks. In addition, it will help the child acknowledge his or her own role in the current dispute. An older child is much more likely to say something like, “I know you’re frustrated – I didn’t do what I said I would. It’s not your fault. I’m really sorry. I’ll get to it today.” A younger one might say, “That’s okay, Mommy. I’m sorry, too.” When the parent leads the way by apologizing, children find it easier and more natural to follow suit.
A good apology is much more than “I’m sorry.” Unless the person states what he or she is sorry about, the words can feel empty and cold. This is where the acknowledgment part comes in: acknowledgment is a summary of the wrongdoing as it affects the other person. When arriving late, for example, a person would say something like, “I’m sorry I’m late. I’ve kept you waiting.” This short, simple-but-complete message names the mistake and its ramifications. Here are a few more examples:
• “I’m sorry I called you ‘immature.’ I know that hurt your feelings.”
• “I’m sorry I forgot to buy you the ________I promised to pick up. I know you must be very disappointed.”
• “I’m sorry I bumped into you. Are you alright?”

Simple and sincere apologies are powerful. They heal relationship wounds. Showing kids how it is done gives them a skill that will truly enhance their lives. Remember: Love is for giving.

Albert Schweitzer has been a strong model for me and I have long studied his writings. He has, unfortunately been forgotten in our time, like so many who have given wisdom to mankind. He first came to my attention when I was the owner/director of our Fasting and Vegetarian Spa & Hotel in Palm beach Florida. I was very impressed by the success of the Gerson Diet. Dr. Max Gerson had been curing diabetes, arthritis and cancer in Europe and had come to the United States to bring the results of 50 Cases of Cancer Cured before congress. The definition of a cure is a patient who is in remission for over five years. Schweitzer was one of Max Gerson’s patients. Schweitzer was a severe diabetic. When, at the age of 75, he sought the help of the raw food pioneer, Max Gerson, he was very ill and taking huge doses of insulin. Gerson took him off his high protein diet, commenting that since it is the pancreas that has to supply most of the enzymes needed to digest protein and since it is the pancreas which is ailing already in diabetes, why flog a dead horse? Poorly digested proteins only create more than their fair share of toxic wastes. Gerson put Schweitzer on a regimen of fresh raw vegetables and lots of vegetable and fruit juices, including apple juice with all its fruit sugar. Ten days later, Gerson judged it safe to reduce his patient’s insulin by half. A month later, Schweitzer needed no insulin at all. His diabetes never returned and he remained healthy, and returned to Africa to a very active life until his death in 1965 at the age of 92.

Using the same and similar methods I have supervised the cures of hundreds of insulin dependent diabetic cases and can testify to the effectiveness of a mostly raw food diet. I did not however, choose to treat cancer patients in-house due to the political nature of the orthodox medics at the time (1977-1985) and the “witch-hunt” tactics of the various Medical Associations attempting to close down any alternative treatment centers for cancer. This however did not extend to the treatment of chronic conditions like diabetes. We treated and cured diabetes, arthritis, coronary conditions and many other conditions given up as hopeless by the doctors. There is an old saying to which I subscribe: – “There is no such thing as a ‘hopeless case’ only hopeless doctors.”
“A Cancer Therapy –Results of Fifty Cases” by Max Gerson
“Let Thy Food Be Thy Medicine”, Hippocrates (460-377 B.C.)
JAMES CAMERON who lived with Schweitzer in order that he might write a series of articles in the “News Chronicle” states: “The Doctor eats only fruits and vegetables – and considerably great quantities of mango, avocado, and soya bean, and above all, an especially huge amount of boiled bananas. The Doctor has no illusions about modern civilization and that is why he advocates a new one built upon Reverence for Life. He believes that modern civilization with its atomic bombs is based wrongfully on destruction of life.”
Dr. ALBERT SCHWEITZER has achieved world fame in so many fields of activity; he cannot be catalogued in one. A great organist and interpreter, of Bach, all music lovers know him. A theologian who challenged the orthodoxy of his day, a philosopher who has delved into the depths of life, he forsook the world in which he had made a secure living to study medicine that he might devote himself to the service of humanity as a medical missionary. Because of the rules of the times in which he lived, he was not supposed to teach but only heal and he did heal – souls as well as bodies. Alone he raised the money for most of the fine work he did in French Equatorial Africa in his hospital in Lambarene. He went to Africa to cure Leprosy and Sleeping Sickness. He won the Nobel Prize for Peace in 1952 of $1,560, 000 which was donated by him solely towards that work. When he first established himself in Africa, there was no doctor within five hundred miles.
I recommend for anyone interested in Schweitzer the book “Reverence for Life – Albert Schweitzer for the 21st Century” Essays edited by Marvin Meyer.
As an ironic point of interest in ending this Blog; my family and I live on Albert Schweitzer Road in our home in Israel.

For your enjoyment and enlightenment, I give you a video of the life of Dr. Albert Schweitzer:

When I saw this I just had to share it. The joy of birth, so well pictured. I cannot wait to see the entire film. I share this with love to you and all your future generations after you.

This is such a testatment to a woman’s body! This is a completely natural experience! NOT a medical emergency. (According to the World Health Organization, 90 to 95 percent of the entire world’s births are normal and require no interventions.)

The U.S. stands ALONE in the fact that the majority of babies are being born in hospitals. The rest of the world, including Europe has used midwives for centuries w/ lower risk of infant/mother death or complications. Facts speak for themselves.

Watch this short trailer for a beautiful film about what Normal, Joyous Birth looks like. Because Normal Birth is always joyous.

If it does not open from here – copy & paste into your browser.

DO NOT LET YOUR CHILD GET FLU VACCINE

This year it is more important that you protect your children and loved ones from the flu vaccines than influenza itself. This article on Lew Rockwell discusses how:
1. The swine flu is simply another flu. It is not unusually deadly.
2. This is the first time both seasonal and pandemic flu vaccines will be administered. Both seasonal flu and swine flu vaccines will require two inoculations. This is because single inoculations have failed to produce sufficient antibodies. This is an admission that prior flu vaccines were virtually useless. Can you trust them this time?
3. Adjuvants are added to vaccines to boost production of antibodies but may trigger autoimmune reactions. Some adjuvants are mercury (thimerosal), aluminum and squalene. Why would you sign a consent form for your children to be injected with mercury, which is even more brain-toxic than lead?
4. This is the first year mock vaccines have been used to gain FDA approval. The vaccines that have been tested are not the same vaccines your children will be given.
5. Over-vaccination is a common practice now in America. American children are subjected to 29 vaccines by the age of two. Meanwhile, veterinarians have backed off of repeat vaccination in dogs because of observed side effects.
6. Modern medicine has no explanation for autism, despite its continued rise in prevalence. Yet autism is not reported among Amish children who go unvaccinated.
7. Researchers are warning that over-use of the flu vaccine and anti-flu drugs like Tamiflu and Relenza can apply genetic pressure on flu viruses and then they are more likely to mutate into a more deadly strain.
8. Most seasonal influenza A (H1N1) virus strains tested from the United States and other countries are now resistant to Tamiflu (oseltamivir). Tamiflu has become a nearly worthless drug against seasonal flu.
9. Public health officials are irresponsible in their omission of any ways to strengthen immunity against the flu. No options outside of problematic vaccines and anti-flu drugs are offered, despite the fact there is strong evidence that vitamins C and D activate the immune system and the trace mineral selenium prevents the worst form of the disease.